How to Take Your Marriage to Another Level - Part 1
Day 1 - Apr 27, 2020
Day 1 - Respect Differences.
We all view reality through different filters depending on our culture, gender, birth order, genetic makeup, and unique history.
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A good relationship requires you to stay emotionally connected to your spouse who thinks, feels, and reacts differently, without needing to change or be fixed up.
Day 2 - Apr 28, 2020
Day 2 - Today is a day of action.
- Your goal today is to “Warm Your Partner's Heart”
- Do something that has significant meaning to them. Significance doesn’t have to mean expensive.
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Make a concerted effort to focus on the positive and do the little things that make your spouse feel loved, valued, and special.
This may feel difficult if you happen to be in the middle of a disagreement and you have a long list of legitimate complaints. But it isn’t impossible. It only requires you to lay those concerns aside and focus on serving each other.
Day 3 - Apr 29, 2020
Day 3 - Today is about the Details
- Watch your words, because words carry weight. Are you crushing your spouse with your words? Are you being crushed?
- Say what you mean and mean what you say, without being mean.
Be intentional about making specific positive comments throughout the day.
Like: “I loved the way you used humor to deal with that situation." After all, we usually have no trouble being specific about the negative, “Why do you always put to much water in the pasta.”
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Don’t make statements disguised as a question
- Slow down!
- Let emotions calm!
- It will lead to better decisions!
Day 4 - Apr 30, 2020
Day 4 - Dial Down the Criticism.
Critical conversations must take place from time to time in your marriage. But they must be discussed at the proper time and in the proper way.
Critical conversations have a window of time. When the window is closed, its just criticizing.
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Remember this: No one can survive in a marriage (at least not happily) if they feel more judged than admired.
Your spouse won't make use of your constructive criticism if there's not a surrounding climate of admiration and respect.
Day 5 - May 1, 2020
Day 5 - Apologize.
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You can say, "I'm sorry for my part of the problem" even if you're secretly convinced that you're only 37 percent to blame.
The failure to initiate repair attempts -- or the failure to respond to your spouses attempt to offer the olive branch and move forward -- are flashing red lights in marriage.