Don’t Talk to Me Like That!!!
Day 1 - Oct 19, 2020
Every good marriage is the product of many good words.
Every bad marriage is the result of bad words—or no words at all.
You need to speak a lot of positive, praising words to create a healthy marriage. Consider how you fell in love in the first place. You talked. You took great care with your choice of words. You spoke encouraging words to each other in order to develop the relationship.
But once many couples have secured their relationship, that carefulness with words seems to fall away. Unintentionally, couples can to develop bad habits. They may stop communicating at all, or they only communicate with criticism, nagging, or demeaning words.
Day 2 - Oct 20, 2020
Here are a few root causes of why our communication fades in marriage:
1) Learned Behavior
Many of our personal habits develop in childhood. Children imitate their parents. That's the first marriage they see, which means their future marriage is likely to reflect what they learned from Mom and Dad. Even in the absence of marriage that reflection begins to develop a behavior.
They could learn to speak to a spouse with kindness, love, and romance. Or they could learn hatefulness, meanness, sarcasm, or silence.
Day 3 - Oct 21, 2020
Another reason communication breaks down in marriages is: Insecurity.
- Dysfunctional communication usually comes from insecurity.
Every person I know has some form of insecurity. Your internal insecurity can keep you from being verbally affectionate toward your spouse.
Day 4 - Oct 22, 2020
Our security should come from God, whose faithfulness is everlasting.
When you put your security in Him:
- You worry less about what others think.
- You don't worry about how your words sound, while still being sensitive to what you say
- Because, a relationship with Him changes everything.
Day 5 - Oct 23, 2020
Ignorance. A lack of knowledge about a woman's needs causes men to say any number of insensitive things. It can cause a husband to not understand her need to feel secure in the relationship—and how that security comes from deep, honest communication. Likewise, women who don't understand their husbands' need for sex, can damaged their marriage by withholding it.
In a healthy marriage, everyone wins. Both the husband and wife understand each other's needs and meet those needs. When you're ignorant of the opposite sex and you're ignorant about how God made marriage, it can cause you to say and do things that are very harmful.