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Training Your Mouth for Marriage

Day 1 - Nov 9, 2020

Proverbs 18:21 says, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit."  The next verse after that always catches my attention: "He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord."  

Are words and marriage connected?  

I believe so.  In fact, I teach that the state of your marriage will never rise above the level of your mouth.

Take Action

Think about this statement again, "the state of your marriage will never rise above the level of your mouth".  Now, think about the words in Proverbs 18:21, "Death & Life are in the power of the tongue".  

  • What are you speaking over your marriage and spouse?
  • Have you said words that you need to say your sorry for?

After you've had a moment to think over your words take action.  


Day 2 - Nov 10, 2020

The words you say and how you say them predict the quality of your marriage with no exceptions.  

To prepare for marriage, we have to prepare our mouths, because the power of life and death are in the words we speak.  

In other words, God wants to use your tongue to create a great life and a great marriage and to bless other people. But the devil wants to use your tongue to destroy your life, damage your family, and hurt other people.

Take Action

Find 1 verse in the Bible that describes a promise or value that you want to see in your marriage.  

  • Speak that verse out loud every morning this week.
  • If you need help finding a verse go to and type in the word your looking for in the search area.  

Day 3 - Nov 11, 2020

Whoever has control over your tongue has control of a powerful thing.  I know many who have destroyed their marriage with their words.

God has created some with an innate talent for speaking.  They have never been at a loss for words.  Whether for good or bad, they’re naturally articulate.  Speaking is a gift. But that may not be the case for the spouse. They may be very wise and can certainly say what they mean, but they’re not as quick choosing their words.  This is where some take advantage. They become dominant, and when they don’t get what they want, they turn words against their spouse.

Take Action

Do you seem to dominate the conversation when it gets intense?  Or, do you become quiet and withdrawn when a conversation becomes intense?  

  • Either way, clear caring communication is the answer.

Day 4 - Nov 12, 2020

Verbally, we can beat each other down. We can accuse each other.  Make our spouse think they are the problem. Or, your spouse can make you think you're the problem.  Men may watch their beautiful spouse wilt before their eyes.

God's restoration of your marriage begins when you apologize.  

  • Remember, you may receive forgiveness but it may take awhile to regain trust.
  • You may have to drastically overhaul the way you speak to your spouse.

Take Action

Words are powerful.  

  • Words bring life and death, and can have an enormous impact on your marriage.
  • What kind of words are you introducing into your marriage?  Are you encouraged or embarrased by the words you speak?

Day 5 - Nov 13, 2020

We live in a world that is vulgar, sarcastic, and verbally hateful.  If you speak that same way to your spouse, you will never have a good marriage until you change.  

You fell in love speaking good things to each other. You spoke life to each other.

  • Marriages begin to fail when bad, hurtful words begin to replace your life-giving words.  

Words do not evaporate. All words are consequential and none of them are neutral. Good words bring good results. Bad words bring bad results. Occasionally I've heard people try to justify the bad things they say by claiming they didn't mean it. "You don't know my heart," they might say.  But in Matthew 12, Jesus says the mouth speaks out of the abundance of the heart. The nature of our words reveals the nature of our hearts. A heart filled with hate and unforgiveness brings forth hateful words.

Take Action

A mean heart produces mean words. But a heart filled with love brings forth loving words, and a pure heart produces pure words.  

  • We have to be careful with the words we say.
  • We have to take responsibility for them—especially in marriage.  
  • What words have you spoken this week that you need to take responsibility for?
  • Speaks words of life over your spouse.