What Marriage Really Means
Day 1 - Aug 25, 2025
What is the meaning of marriage?
If I were to ask you that question in person, would you have a good answer? I've found that most married couples don't really know how to answer that question, but it is essential to a successful relationship.
- In order to know what we are trying to accomplish in marriage—and what God wants to accomplish—we have to know its purpose.
There are three core things that happen when a man and woman get married. Protecting and preserving this core will make your marriage strong.
Take Action
Let's first go a little deeper on those two words:
- Protecting
- Preserving
Both of these words require foresight and intentionality. To often couples unintentionally assume that if we are in love we shouldn't have problems. Or, at least not major problems. The reality is that we need to be on guard for each other. Mandy and I constantly tell couples to NEVER stop pursuing or protecting your spouse's heart.
Before we go further, let's do a personal evaluation. Are you really ready to do whatever it takes to Protect & Preserve your marriage? Take a moment and picture what that looks like to you.
Day 2 - Aug 26, 2025
In every marriage, there are three core areas where couples must strive for unity. Protecting these areas is essential for building a strong marriage that thrives in all aspects of life.
The 1st Area: Financial Unity
The first area we’ll discuss is Financial Unity. Before marriage, a man and woman are viewed as separate individuals by the state. They pay taxes independently and own their own property. However, once they say "I do," they become a single financial unit. Research shows that couples who marry often experience greater financial stability than those who remain single.
- In many ways, marriage is the greatest wealth-producing entity on earth.
What Could Go Wrong with Financial Unity?
The key question is: Are you truly in Unity, or have you merely settled for Union?
- Union means you've combined your finances.
- Unity means you are in agreement about how to manage those finances together.
If you're not in unity, the differences in how you view and handle money can lead to significant stress. Money can impact your relationship, especially if you disagree on how it should be spent. The pursuit of wealth can even compete with the time you spend together as a couple and with the Lord.
Moreover, focusing solely on financial gain can strain your health and well-being. Work-related stress often takes a toll, making it crucial that you protect your financial core without sacrificing your marriage or personal health.
Take Action
As you navigate financial decisions, remember the wisdom of Scripture: “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:21. This highlights the importance of aligning your financial priorities with your values and beliefs.
Have a Conversation
Tonight, take the time to have an open conversation with your spouse.
Ask the question: “Do you think we’re healthy in how we handle our finances?”
If either of you feels that your financial situation isn’t healthy, don’t tackle this topic alone. Seek wise help! Engaging a financial advisor or counselor can provide valuable insights and help you both achieve true unity.
- Understanding and achieving Financial Unity is vital for a healthy marriage.
- By prioritizing this area, you can strengthen your relationship and build a solid foundation for your future together.
Reflect on this: How can we work together to ensure that our financial decisions reflect our values and strengthen our bond as a couple?
Day 3 - Aug 27, 2025
Meeting Needs
In this Marriage Minute, we turn our focus to "Meeting Needs," a vital aspect of a thriving marriage. Understanding how to meet each other's needs is essential for nurturing a strong and lasting relationship.
Understanding Needs
First, we must recognize that some needs can only be met by the Lord. Spiritual fulfillment, emotional healing, and inner peace come through our relationship with God. As it is written, “My God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19).
Beyond this, God has purposed spouses to meet each other's needs. When you say "I do," your spouse becomes your next of kin, and this commitment signifies a sacred responsibility to support and care for one another.
The Design of Marriage
Consider the biblical account of creation: God created Adam but saw that he could not meet all his own needs. Thus, He created Eve to be a complement to Adam. This is a key point to remember: We complement each other; we do not complete each other.
When God unites you in marriage, the bond formed is stronger than any familial relationship. As stated in Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.” Partnership is essential for both spouses to thrive.
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The Power of Partnership
In healthy marriages, both partners actively engage in meeting each other’s needs. Unhealthy dynamics often arise when one spouse dominates the other or refuses to accept differences. In contrast, couples in strong marriages celebrate these differences, recognizing that they provide unique strengths to the relationship.
- Think about a few areas in which you and your spouse differ.
- These differences can be strengths when approached with love and understanding.
Celebration of Differences
Now, focus on one specific area where you and your spouse are very different. Consider how you can celebrate that difference instead of viewing it as a challenge.
- This could mean finding joy in your spouse's unique interests or encouraging them in their passions.
As you ponder these concepts, ask yourselves this compelling question: What specific need can I meet for my spouse this week that will deepen our connection and strengthen our partnership?
Day 4 - Aug 28, 2025
Sexual Exclusivity
In this lesson, we delve into the crucial topic of "Sexual Exclusivity," a core element of the marriage relationship. Understanding this aspect is vital for fostering a deep and healthy connection between spouses.
The Importance of Sexual Exclusivity: Becoming sexual partners is not just a physical act; it represents a profound commitment that is exclusive to marriage. In your relationship, you may spend money, share conversations, and engage in various activities with others, but intimacy belongs uniquely to you and your spouse. This bond signifies that you belong to each other, and you promise to be faithful to one another.
Use, Not Abuse
It is essential to underscore that this “use” of each other’s bodies is grounded in mutual respect and love—not abuse. Your intimacy should reflect both spouses’ desires and comfort levels. Always remember: “It's 'Use' not 'Abuse'!” Ensuring that both spouses feel valued and respected is paramount.
The Role of Communication
One of the most effective ways to enhance sexual intimacy in your marriage is to talk about it.
- Your marriage should be H.O.T.—Honest, Open, and Transparent.
- Creating a safe environment for these discussions allows both partners to express their feelings and desires without fear of judgment.
Too often, couples rely on assumptions about each other’s needs and preferences.
- Instead, it’s time to stop assuming and start understanding.
- Open dialogue is key to knowing what truly makes your spouse feel loved and desired.
Take Action
To initiate this important conversation, consider using a simple exercise: both spouses should write down three things they like and one thing they don’t care for as much regarding intimacy. Then, exchange your lists and discuss them together.
Once you’ve read your spouse’s responses, ask them “Why” they feel that way. Understanding the reasons behind their preferences provides invaluable insight into their needs, fostering a deeper connection.
Reflective Questions
As you engage in these discussions, consider these two compelling questions:
- What specific needs does my spouse have regarding intimacy that I may not fully understand?
- How can I create a more open and safe environment for discussing our sexual relationship?
Day 5 - Aug 29, 2025
Protecting Your Marriage
In this final lesson, we focus on the importance of protecting your marriage from the enemy's attacks, which often target three core areas: Finances, Family, and Sex. Understanding and safeguarding these areas is essential for a thriving relationship.
The Core Areas Under Attack
When the devil seeks to disrupt marriages, he typically targets these three vital aspects. Finances can lead to stress, Family Dynamics can create division, and Sexual Intimacy can become a point of contention. If any of these areas suffer, the entire marriage begins to experience strain.
As it says in 1 Peter 5:8, “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” This verse reminds us to be vigilant and proactive in protecting our relationships.
- By actively safeguarding these core areas, you will witness continual improvement in your marriage.
- Conversely, if you neglect or misuse these aspects, your marriage will struggle.
Guard these three areas diligently, and you will elevate your relationship to new heights.
Financial Harmony: First, focus on getting your finances in order. Set clear goals and ensure you are both aligned in your financial planning.
- Discuss your budgeting, savings, and spending habits openly. As Proverbs 21:5 states, “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.”
- Establishing a financial plan together fosters unity and reduces stress.
Meeting Each Other's Needs: Next, shift your focus from meeting your own needs to meeting the needs of your spouse.
- This applies not only to financial matters but also to companionship, communication, and sexual intimacy.
- Remember, it’s impossible to address needs you are unaware of, so make it a priority to have consistent and open conversations.
Strengthening the Core Areas: Keeping these core areas strong will lead to a robust and resilient marriage.
- As you protect your finances, nurture your family relationships, and cultivate intimacy, you'll discover that your marriage flourishes.
Take Action
As you reflect on this Marriage MInute, consider these questions:
- What specific steps can I take to ensure our finances are in alignment and supportive of our marriage?
- How can I better meet my spouse's needs in the areas of companionship, communication, and intimacy?
By prioritizing these discussions and actions, you will fortify your marriage and create a lasting partnership rooted in love and understanding.