Are Soulmates a Myth?
Day 1 - Sep 2, 2024
Our topic this week is fun and intriguing. Especially since we've been influenced from an early age, of what the answer should be, about soulmates. So, here we go!
Is Your Spouse Your Soulmate?
A more direct question is, "Can you and your spouse actually be Soulmates"? The reason marriages truly succeed is because we allow God to intervene and heal us—and because we began following His plan for our marriage. We put in the hard work that leads to us becoming best friends and soulmates. Most stories don’t fit the typical romantic idea about finding and marrying the person of your dreams. That's because much of what our culture believes about soulmates is based on false expectations that set couples up for failure.
There are three dangerous soulmate myths:
The first myth is that my soulmate will be just like me. The online dating world tells us it's possible to instantly connect with a person because we match up in category after category.
Take Action
Are you under the impression that if you and your spouse are Soulmates everything should be easy?
Are you under the impression that since you're facing difficulty in your marriage, and the feelings aren't as strong as they use to be, that you must not be soulmates and you must have fallen out of love? That's garbage!
There are NO PERFECT MARRIAGES!!! But, there are some great marriages, and all great marriages take a great deal of work, and it's well worth it.
- The question you need to ask is simple and direct. How hard are you working on your marriage?
- I know what you're thinking. What about asking that same question to my spouse? It definitely takes two, but let's focus on what is easiest to work on, "Ourselves". I didn't say easy, I said easiest.
- Invest into your marriage today. Serve your spouse in a special way. Buy a marriage book. Clean the house. Do something, today!
Day 2 - Sep 3, 2024
There have been many people who have found success with online dating, and that's wonderful. We have even recommended a few online faith-based programs. Our individual differences are designed by the Lord, and we must know that no two people are perfectly compatible.
- Compatibility is based on Character and Values—not on Sameness.
Take Action
You and your spouse may have many similarities, and that's wonderful, but it's how you deal with the differences that can take your marriage to another level.
- How is your spouse different from you? Identifying your spouse's differences are easy, but taking time to understand why they have those differences requires asking & listening.
- Is that a challenge to you or do you embrace their difference?
- What does "embracing their differences" look like to you?
Day 3 - Sep 4, 2024
Often, it's only after marrying someone that you find out how very different you both are in the beginning of life's journey together.
Assuming you and your spouse should be a perfect match can break your heart. The second myth is that marrying my soulmate means a problem-free marriage. This perception can cause huge disappointment, and it's unfair to both of you.
- Many people think marrying their soulmate brings day after day of positive feelings in marriage.
- In various life moments, every couple will face issues they need to work through.
Take Action
Every couple will experience some negative feelings toward each other.
- Marrying a believer and building a foundation of good communication can minimize these problems, but it doesn't prevent them.
- You're never going to avoid every obstacle or conflict.
- You need to work together and allow the Lord to help you navigate through them.
Day 4 - Sep 5, 2024
Guard your mind!
The enemy wants nothing more than for you to experience negative feelings one day and think, "I married the wrong person."
Here's the truth: Soul mates are not born. They are made in the trenches of life. The greatest marriages are those where two committed believers roll up their sleeves and fight hard for their relationship.
The third myth is that my soul mate will always make me happy. No one person can meet all of your needs or always make you happy. The basis of happiness is God. Only He can meet our deepest needs.
Take Action
Giving any individual the responsibility for your happiness sets that person up for failure. It's unfair and it's a lie! If you have intentionally or even unintentionally placed this repsonsibility on your spouse, you will bring heartache into your life and your marriage.
- You are a Helpmate to each other.
- You have the ability to make everything better, or worse.
- Keep in mind, you are NEVER each other's source of Joy, or each other's source of Pain.
Day 5 - Sep 6, 2024
Remember - Don't believe the Myths!
Instead, do the things that create a soulmate. Make choices that build a bond between you and your spouse.
Our culture tells a number of lies about soulmates. Don't believe those myths. Instead, believe the truth: Your soulmate is someone who puts you first, gives to you, and cares about you.
Empathize with each other by attempting to understand your spouse. Try to walk in their shoes for a moment and see things from their perspective.
Take Action
Are you working hard to become your spouse's soulmate?
How long or recent has it been since you chose to be generous with each other by giving kindness and attention.
Look for ways to do the following:
- Invest in each other by leaving your spouse a love note or a loving text.
- Listen with your eyes as well as your ears.
- Talk and make your marriage a priority by connecting.
- Spend time together and put each other first.
- Surprise your spouse with one of their favorites "just because".